Darwinism -- This shit was once food.

Capitalism -- That's MY shit.

Communism -- Let's share this shit.

Feminism -- Men are shit.

Chauvinism -- We may be shit, but you can't live without us.

Commercialism -- Let's package this shit.

Islam -- If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.

Islam 2 -- If shit happens, kill the person responsible.

Islam 3 -- If shit happens, blame Israel.

Impressionism -- From a distance, this shit looks like a garden.

Idolism -- Let's bronze this shit.

Existencialism -- Shit doesn't happen, shit IS.

Existencialism 2 -- What is shit, anyway?

Hinduism -- This shit happened before.

Catholicism -- If shit happens, you deserve it.

Protestantism -- Let shit happen to someone else.

Judaism -- Why does this shit ALWAYS happen to us?

Presbyterian -- This shit was bound to happen.

Hare Krishna -- Shit happens, rama rama.

Rastafarianism -- Let's smoke this shit.

Atheism -- What shit?

Atheism 2 -- I can't believe this shit!

Nihilism -- "No shit"

New Age -- This shit has an aura.

New Age 2 -- This shit is all ONE shit.

Astrology -- If shit happens, blame Saturn.

Astrology 2 -- Shit is written in the stars.

Materialism -- I want more shit.

Satanism -- SNEPPAH TIHS

Jehovah's Witnesses -- Knock, knock, shit happens.

Jehovah's Witnesses 2 -- May we have a moment of your time to show some of

our shit?

Jehovah's Witnesses 3 -- Shit has been prophesied and is imminent, only the

righteous shall survive its happening.

Moon-ism -- Only really happy shit happens.

Calvinism -- Shit happens because you don't work.

Seventh Day Adventism -- No shit shall happen to Saturday.

Creationism -- God made all shit.

TV Evangelism -- Send more shit.

TV Evangelism 2 -- If shit happens to a televangelist, it's okay.

Secular Humanism -- Shit evolves.

Christian Science -- When shit happens, don't call a doctor - pray.

Christian Science 2 -- Shit happening is all your mind.

Quakers -- Let's not fight over this shit.

Unitarianism -- Come let us reason together about this shit.

Taoism -- Shit happens.

Confuisanism -- Confucius says "Shit happens".

Buddhism -- If shit happens, it's not really shit.

Zen Buddhism -- Shit is, and is not.

Zen Buddhism 2 -- What is the sound of shit happening?

Lutheran -- If shit happens, don't talk about it.

Episcopalian -- It's not so bad if shit happens, as long as you serve the

right wine with it.

Methodist -- It's not so bad if shit happens, as long as you serve the right

grape juice with it.

Hedonism -- There's nothing like a good shit happening!

Stocism -- This shit doesn't bother me.

Zoroastrianism -- Shit happens half of the time.

Practical -- Deal with shit one day at a time.

Utopianism -- This shit doesn't stink at all.

AND SHIT KEEP HAPPENING...